Happy New Year, sluts! Lots of things are going on in life and love and I thought I'd try my best to jump back into sharing here.
Over the years we have played with people together and occasionally separate. However the one consistent thing was always we met them together to start off. As in, maybe The Hubs and a friend would hook up but the majority of the time we would play as a threesome and it always started as a three some. Then came The Girlfriend.
Now we differ on her title, so let me explain. He would NOT call her a girlfriend but he would probably call her his playmate, FWB or his sub. I don't mean "girlfriend" as a bad thing, I just mean she is a playmate of his who thus far has been only played with solo. And actually, I've never even met her. It is all with my knowledge so it is above board so I don't see girlfriend as a bad thing. They have gone out to dinner and talk by text every day. Plus she needs a blog name! :)
This concept is totally new for us. And we're having to navigate a few new situations but here are a few reasons why it has even the remote possibility of working for us:
Our main "rules" still apply. The little things we do; we don't do phone conversations because then I can't read up and stay updated. We don't meet up or play without prior knowledge given to each other. Basic things like that. We stick to the fundamental rules that have made us a successful swinging couple for many years. If it ain't broke why fix it? These boundaries have always worked for us, they just needed a few adaptations to work in a solo situation. Breaking them will only lead to hurt, anger and a swift end to our participation in this lifestyle.
Total and complete honesty. Even if you do something stupid or the situation makes you look bad you gotta be honest. Tell the whole story and admit when you fuck up and it will be ok. If The Hubs did something stupid I wouldn't be mad at him as long as he tells me. Shit happens. I do stupid shit all.the.time. but if you 'fess up it always goes better.
Complete Openness. As in everything. Even if something is within the rules and normal scope we both get to know about it. Period.
Trust. This is the most important component of all. If we don't have 100% trust in each other and our system then it's game over and we go back to a monogamous marriage. And some serious counseling, perhaps. This is something I think of often and don't take lightly. There is nothing worth breaking this and I know The Hubs feels the same.
There are some new things happening but I'm sure we'll get through them and find a new normal. Hopefully I'll be back on here to take you along on the ride.
**Editor's Note... since this was written we have played as a threesome. Blog post coming :)